I stumbled across this awesome post. Its all about features games should have, that ensure a smooth, familiar experience to a certain degree on most any game. It also lists, contrary to the title, a bunch of donts. Now, what I do want to add are a few features to specific genres:

RPG:

• Save points anywhere, anytime. Yes, its very manly to redo a dungeon, for the tent-, no now eleven… *throws DS at the wall* Well, guess I’m not finishing your perfectly crafted opus now am I? Your goal is to ensure a smooth and fun gaming experience. Not to throw goal after goal after goal in my way. I appreciate a reasonable challenge, when I face a dungeon thats just out of my level, or if I go in an area to strong for me. Understandable… yes. In every single dungeon? (I’m looking at you FFX, FFVII… FFVIII, FFIII, ah, screw it. Any Dungeon Quest game or Final Fantasy game.) You ever wonder why Pokemon got so popular.

• Less cutscenes, more storytelling. Oh, joy, another long, drawn out, overly-dramatic attempt at making a movie. While I appreciate good storytelling and excellent graphics as much as the next guy, before you decide you must waste hours of renderfarm time…consider this question: Is there any way I can impart this information while leaving control in the player’s hands? Its a video game. I want to control the action and story, not have it fed to me.

FPS:

• Hmm… nothing for me to add here.

Well, thats all I have for now.

I mean seriously. I’ve never seen people get so outraged, over so little… as I have this April Fools day.

Okay, the situation is basic. This video went up. It is a prank. It is a live-action movie trailer for Legend of Zelda. Very well-done trailer, great idea for a prank. Entertain people, get their hopes up. I didn’t see people getting their hopes up. I saw people venting rage forth as if it were their child that had been murdered.

“Ganon’s head is too big!”

Gee, are you also one of those people that rant and rave about mistakes in films? Its a trailer. Get over it. Go outside. Have fun.

“HOW DARE YOU MAKE THIS TRAVESTY OF A MOVIE!!??”

Hey, at least you know how to spell travesty! You have something going for you at least. You could pretend to be pretentious. Well, not quite pretend. Oh by the way, theres a little thing called capitalization? Stop murdering your poor, poor, overused Caps Lock key.

And of course, there are plenty of comments I would not reprint. But why would people get so worked up over a movie version of a game? Personally, I felt it was a well-done movie trailer. The Legend of Zelda series has an almost timeless or iconic feel to the storylines. Link hardly ever talks, yet, we’re drawn into this incredible world of courage, good and evil…A good director would do a decent job.

And, then, on top of the “fools” angry about the movie being made… when they realized it was a prank… hoo boy. I could feel the flames all the way up here in the Frozen Wasteland of Canada. I’ve heard of expressing your opinion. Doesn’t mean I need to feel like you just covered my face in spittle from your exhortations as to how lame IGN is to trick you.

Grow up.

 Sincerely,

 An adult.